Tough Mama

I am finally learning to be tough with my youngest, at least on some things. I was always the one who would baby my kids if they didn't like something or didn't want to do something. I always felt bad if they weren't enjoying life, as though it was my responsibility to turn their moods to happiness no matter what the situation. Well no more, or not so much as before.

My son started school yesterday and it went off without a hitch. I was surprised because every time I have brought up school in the last week he did not want to think or talk about it one bit. He felt he needed more time off. In fact, he said that we should not have gone our road trip because it took time away from being home doing whatever he wanted. Strange comment I thought, because he loved our trip, we had a good time and he really did do what he wanted to most of the time. But he said he wanted those three weeks back.

So this morning he did not want to get up and when I finally forced him out of bed he started his tirade about how school is a waste of time and how he could learn everything he needs to know from books and how he learns nothing there. It is all a flashback from last school year.

This is not a fun way to start the day for him or for me. I have discovered that no amount of discussion or reasoning works to change this. Not so amazing, really when does that help if a kid doesn't want to do something?

What to do? Get tough. Make him get out of bed and get dressed. Say yes I heard how you feel now enough and time to get ready and go. Do not discuss reasons for not going to school. Make sure that food is eaten! Put on shoes, glasses, brush hair, fill backpack. All the while ignoring the litany of complaints streaming from his mouth.

We make it out the door just barely on time. Complaints cease and he starts running down the driveway? He trips and falls because his backpack is so heavy. As soon as he goes down he yells " I'm alright ". We check out the milkweed at the end of the driveway and finally find the first monarch caterpillar of the year. The bus comes and he jumps on and is gone for the day.

Now I am not sure how it will be next week when he goes back to school. He is pretty adamant about not wanting to be there and that never stopped last year. I had to make him go to the very last day. Some days there is no trouble and he gets ready and goes, but I know that it usually doesn't last. So I have learned to be tough, to shut out the complaints and make him go and above all do not feel sorry for him, that is one of the worst things you can do for a child.